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Name: Chad
Scripture: no

OAP: I am angry today. It generally takes alot to make me have any sort of emotional reaction and the build up of the past month seems to have done it. I am seventeen on spring break, this is a time that I will never get to experience again. There are great times that I will never have because of this month. Tomorrow my best friends will be at the beach and I will be at home, doing nothing, for no obvious reason. The only thing I will be doing is not experience memories. Yeah I know, God is using this time to expose what I care about, what I can sometimes worship, but I am pissed off right now and I am not going to cover that up. The only thing that I see coming out of this is the anger, "you are going to let this go, and you will hate it" Ok God, why? "so that you will hate it" that's the jist of what I am getting right now. Atleast something was happening, changing. Now it is just, "you are going to not do this so that you wont have a weekend, or a week, or a spring break". You aren't going to talk to your friends who wont be back in town untill summer, just because. You aren't going to be with your friends who are leaving after this summer. By the way both groups are going to change and you will never have a chance to experience them as they are right now ever again.
How this fits into God's plan is kinda secondary for me right now, but ill address it. What if God would have said all of this last summer, the night before everyone left for college, or for the waterski trip, or when we drove down to LA. Knowing how those things turned out would I be willing to let God take them away? I can't for the life of me see any good that would come from taking those times away.
In addition to the anger (and it is anger, not "frustration") I am bored out of my mind. In past month I have read more theology and IR theory than the rest of the year combined. I enjoy them both normally, but now I am mostly sick of it. I have been extremely short with my parents lately. I don't even think I am trying right now, after one or two comments that I deem stupid I simply leave, even then because of the remodel there is no place to go, and no where outside the house for me to go to, nothing inside the house for me to do.
I am not going to resolve this now, I am not going to make this a full circle of God's plan and my understanding of it. I am not going to deal with all of this tonight and post my prayer that exudes confidence and understanding and trust. I don't need reassurance or encouragement, I'll get there and I know how it is going to go, but right now this is where I am at. and that's my whole prayer.